To Go or Not To Go... Is that a Question?
Published: Friday, October 29, 2021
By: Bob Bitchin
The closer I got to setting off on my first long voyage, the more excuses I found not to go. It was a lot of years ago, but I can still recall how I would try to rationalize not leaving. Oh, I wanted to cruise; no doubt about that. I had read the books by Triston Jones, the Pardeys, and Herb Payson. I very much wanted to go and live those adventures.
But I also was pretty attached to the comforts of living in Southern California where I had a pretty idyllic life. I was 35 years old and lived in a beautiful marina only a block from a beach where some of the most beautiful women in the world came to play. I had a lot of friends and life was good.
Sitting below decks on the original Lost Soul, I had mentally backed out of taking off a few times. Negative thoughts would hit me at the oddest times. What about storms? Every book I read about long distance cruising had storms and the weather here was great. What about breaking things out at sea? If I break something here all I have to do is drop a hook and I can get whatever parts I need immediately. Also, I could always call the Coast Guard if I got into trouble. And convenience? How kewl is it to get anything you need just about any time you want it? I'd read about how shopping could be a major ordeal when you were "out there."
Back then at the end of the seventies, a lot of my friends were getting ready to take off cruising. Dr. Larry Hazen had set his date and stuck to it. He sailed the South Pacific for years, finally settling in Guam after about ten years of adventuring. My editor of Latitudes & Attitudes, Sue, was also planning to take off. She and her husband sailed off with Dr. Hazen, and they still live aboard the same boat they lived on then.
So, I set the date. I decided no matter where I was with the boat, I was going to sail down to Mexico on November 1!
In the ensuing months, as I prepared for this life altering voyage, there were times when I fought hard against the departure. The only thing I can attribute to the fact that I actually left the dock was a perseverance that was ingrained in me when I used to ride my Harley across the country a couple times a year.
You see, in my previous life I was active in motorcycling legislation. In other words, I was very active fighting the helmet laws. So I would end up riding from Los Angeles to New York for a protest (well, it was the seventies!) and then to Sturgis, South Dakota, or Daytona Beach, Florida. Sometimes, in the dead of winter, I wondered at the sanity of riding two wheels across the U.S., but after each trip, I could look back on some great adventures. And that was how I convinced myself to look at untying the dock lines for a voyage that would take me far from the comforts of my home port.
A couple of the women I was dating back then (this was long before meeting Jody) did everything they could do to try and talk me out of going "out there." They said I'd be killed or that I'd get sick drinking the water in foreign ports, or I'd catch some kind of disease. (I know what they were thinking!) But I stuck doggedly to my plans. They called me obstinate and stubborn. I looked at it as having perseverance. The difference, I think, is that perseverance is a case of "will do," while obstinacy is a case of "won't do." I prefer the positive.
When I look at the majority of people I meet "out there" sailing, I would say the vast majority plan on someday cutting the dock lines and sailing off into the sunset. It's been a dream for people for as long as I can remember. The funny thing is, after 30 years living on and around boats, I find that a very small percentage ever end up actually doing it and actually leaving.
The reasons are plentiful, but for the most part they are based on money or the lack of the same, or the spouse not wanting to go, and these are grave obstacles to overcome. But the reality is that at every stage of your life, there are two things you can do. The decision you make on which of the two roads you will follow ends up creating what your life becomes.
When you were in school you had two choices: to work hard or not. If you chose to work hard, you soon had two choices: college or the workforce. After that choice you looked at marriage or not, and step by step you created the place in life where you are sitting right now. It's not complicated, just one choice at a time.
I often look back down my life's road and wonder where I'd be if I had made one decision differently. Would I be me? Would I be the same person, and if not, who would I be?
The decision I made 30 years ago changed my life. That I know. Was it for better or for worse? Who knows?! And what's more important? Who cares?!
Do you have a life's plan? Are you going to head out? Just remember, it may be easier not to do something than to do it, but which is more fulfilling?
A version of this article appeared in the Fall Issue (September/October) 2021 of Great Lakes Scuttlebutt magazine.
tags: Lifestyle, Sailing, Travel
